Did You Hear the One About the Shoe Salesman?

 

You know how there is the question, if you could go back in time what would you tell your younger self? I would tell young Alan, "Always wear decent shoes. Good shoes that fit and support your feet. Don't wear crap." Unfortunately I wore mostly Sears cheapo shoes as a teenager, and crap shoes in my twenties. I worked for a shoe wholesale shop back then, and the shoes were almost all imported from Poland. This is back when Poland was still a communist country with no quality or standards. Just a bunch of comrades slapping leather together. My boss let me buy my shoes for cost, so they were dirt cheap. Mostly I got the work boots which actually didn't look too bad, but boy did they fit like shit. So I started out as a kid with flat feet that splayed outwards, and ended up making them even worse as an adult. I now have worse flat feet, a neuroma in my right foot that the doctor says he can't fix, neuropathy in my toes, and a chipped ankle bone. This has made me very particular about what shoe I buy. Now I go to high end athletic shoe stores and try on shoes until find the pair that is just right. I did that last Thursday. I was the first customer for Lauren, the shoe sales lady. Poor Lauren, she had no idea what her morning was going to be like. She brought me four shoes to try on at first. It was like Goldilocks but without the 'just right' part. I hated all of them. So Lauren says, "I'll go down and get you some more to try on." Yes, the shoes in this store were all in the basement. That lady had to go up and down the stairs at least ten times, not counting the trips back down there to return the dozens of shoes I didn't buy. I did finally find a pair that fit me thanks to Lauren. And kudos to her for not just having the stamina and good nature to run up and down those stairs. No, she also listened to my stupid jokes for nearly an hour.