Sicko

I haven't been feeling well lately. Not horrible, or really sick, just not well. My stomach has not been upset, nor have I had any other intestinal problems besides the occasional gas emissions that I've been a master of for decades. It was just that I was feeling sluggish, and I was having a little more acid indigestion than usual. I found myself grabbing the Zantac, and slugging down Alka Seltzer at an increased rate. So it was quite a surprise to me at what happened Sunday Morning and all the rest of that day. I'll try to put it as nicely as possible. Things were coming out of me that I have never seen before except maybe when I've had Cuban black bean soup. It really did scare me, and of course things like this always seem to happen on a weekend. One thing was for sure, I was not going to the emergency room and sit there for hours with all the other poor suckers who picked the weekend to get sick.

Monday morning I immediately called the doctor, and went over to see him. After some questions, and very uncomfortable probing, It turns out that I have a bleeding ulcer. The ramifications of this did not sink in at first, but after the doctor sat me down and explained everything, the horror of it all came crashing down. No more of Mark's delicious, highly spiced food. No more junk food like White Castles, and Wendy's double stacks with cheese. No more Mexican food. Oh, and did I mention, no more vodka, wine, or beer. I know that as time passes, and I start feeling better I'll begin to cheat back towards eating what I want. I just wonder what vodka and Maalox tastes like.