Taking a Leak

I live in a house of cards. A fragile matrix of mechanical parts, electronics, and plumbing. Touch one part of this stew and another reacts.

I was sitting in my big fluffy chair last night watching American Idol, when one of their handy ten minute commercial breaks came along. I decided to take advantage of it and get a snack and a drink, but first I had to go take a leak. I stepped into the hall on the way to the bathroom, and I heard a squishing sound. I looked down, I was standing in a quarter inch of water. I opened the closet door, and sure enough more water. Water everywhere.

Here is the chain of events as best I can figure out. It all had started earlier in the day when I was assessing the damage under the kitchen sink. Some months ago the garbage disposal had sprung a leak. This in turn soaked the cabinet under the sink, which caused the shelf under there to expand and ultimately collapse. The collapsing shelf was to be repaired by me, so I went to the hall closet to get some tools. When I moved the tools, I noticed the condenser pump for the A/C was not positioned correctly, so I moved it back against the wall where I wanted it. Within a few minutes I noticed that the air-conditioning had stopped working so I went around and reset all the circuit breakers. Still no A/C. The only variable was the fact that I had touched the condenser pump. So I returned to the hall closet and gave the pump a tap. It took off working, the A/C kicked on, and all was good with my world. That is until I took that pee break and found that the goddamned condenser pump was leaking. If I had left that mother scratching pump alone earlier in the day, I'd have already taken that pee, got my snack and drink, and still had a few minutes to spare. As it is, I made it back just as Ryan Seacrest was introducing the next sob story. Those American Idol ad breaks are way too long.