A Beautiful Sunday Morning

A lovely, sunny Sunday morning. The birds are chirping outside the kitchen window, butterflies flutter around the jasmine bush, and the dogs are lazing on the end of the bed.

            "Mark, would you like waffles for breakfast today?" I ask in my cheeriest voice.

            "Sure, that sounds good to me." Mark replies.

So off to the kitchen I go. Into a bowl I poured heavy whipping cream and two spoonfuls of sugar, and then beat the mixture into a cloud of heavenly sweetness. In another bowl I mixed milk, melted butter, and an egg. This was then combined with malt flavored waffle flour. It already was developing a delicious aroma. While I sliced strawberries to put on the waffles, I could hear the light jazz music from the dining room accompanying the songs of the birds outside. It was such a beautiful morning. I took my waffle batter and poured some onto the waffle iron. While that cooked I set the table and put out juice glasses for the orange juice that would accompany this special breakfast. Meanwhile out in the kitchen I noticed that the batter in the waffle iron had started to overflow onto the counter, so I grabbed a sponge and started to wipe up the little spill. Not thinking, I moved the waffle iron out of my way to get to the puddle of spilled batter.

            "Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck...     Fuck!"

 I relearned something that I already knew yesterday morning. And that is, that waffle irons are very hot, and that you should not try to move one by grabbing the metal part of it with your bare hand.