Ball Sack

Thirty six years ago, my new boyfriend talked me into joining his bowling league. So I got me a bowling ball and some shoes and I became a bowler. I was horrible at it and I always felt that I was responsible when our team lost. I probably was, considering the number of times my ball ended up in the gutter. After a while the newness of the boyfriend wore off and we were more like an old married couple. A little more time passed and then we became exes. But I did continue bowling, only not with him. I joined a lesbian bowling league. I'm pretty sure that some of the other bowlers did not appreciate our team of all men being involved. Especially when we came in second place. I still remember accepting that lovely trophy with the lady bowler on it.

When I moved to Florida I naturally joined the gay bowling league. That is the easiest way to meet new people when you move. Oh sure, I could have joined a church to meet people, but they don't drink or curse. After many years of bowling in Florida, I decided to quit. Not because I wanted to, but because I looked around and I was now the oldest guy on the league. Also my team dumped me... assholes.

A few weeks ago I went up to the bowling alley here in Chicago, on the night that the gays bowl. A few people I know bowl on that league, and I suddenly got the urge to bowl again. Unfortunately I could not find my bowling ball bag with the ball and shoes in it that I had in Florida. That was a very good bowling ball, and I was really sorry that it got lost in the move. So I went to the pro shop here and bought another ball along with a pair of shoes and a bag. While I was waiting for the guy to drill my ball, I called my friend Dennis.

"Where are you?"

"I'm at the bowling pro shop buying a new ball and shoes. I can't find my old ball anywhere. I'm pretty sure the movers stole it, those thieves."

"Alan, you just aren't right in the head."

"Huh, what do you mean?"

"I was with you when the movers were there. You picked up your bowling bag, with the ball and shoes inside, and you threw it in the garbage. You told me that you would never bowl again."

It was a long day and I must have been very, very tired.