Old Fart Shopping

 

I did my weekly grocery shopping yesterday. Went to the early morning old people time at Jewel. As usual it was not crowded at all, and I didn't even have to use Mark's handicap tag for parking. Also, as usual, the old people rule was not being enforced. Young people were seen among all the old farts, zipping around the store, going the wrong way up the one way aisles. Like I said, it wasn't crowded so who cares. And a couple of the young people were easy on the eyes. As long as I didn't stare or drool, I figure no harm done.

So what is it with the toilet paper? I went over to the toilet paper aisle and it was filled with toilet paper. But not my toilet paper. From one end to the other were strange brands I have never heard of before. I picked up a few of the packages and squeezed them, just like Mr. Whipple. The rolls of paper were the same size as my brand, but what they were was mostly air. I'm pretty sure one roll of that off brand toilet paper would only last one, maybe two sittings. So I was upset. I would have to make those last three rolls at home go a little further. As I turned my shopping cart up the aisle (the wrong way) I saw it. An eight pack of my toilet paper brand turned upside down and backwards, stuffed in with the off brand toilet paper. The only package in the entire store. I put it in my cart right next to the box of Kellogg's Raisin Bran. I would have my morning fiber, and the correct toilet tissue for later in the day. All was right with the world.