Feeling Blue

 

Having lost thirty pounds over the last year and a half, I've found that my waist size has diminished with the weight. When I started the change in eating habits, my thirty eight inch pants were getting very tight on me. Now I am down to thirty six inches and those are a bit loose. So this got me thinking, didn't I have a pair of blue jeans I bought about ten years ago that I never wore? I did. I had bought a nice pair of Levi jeans without actually trying them on. When I did try them on at home, I found them to be tighter than a camel's ass in a sand storm (I had a better saying, but it was way too rude). So I put them away, hoping that one day I would get my weight under control and be able to use them. Those jeans sat at the bottom of my drawer for years. They even moved to Chicago with me. They were always there. Finally, now that they might actually fit me, I can't find them. I looked all over yesterday afternoon. In all my drawers, all my closets, and then looked in the basement where I stored all of Mark's old clothes. There were plenty of jeans and pants down there. All with twenty eight inch waists. Damn, Mark never could gain weight. We ate the same food, yet while I blew up like a dirigible, Mark stayed thin. Anyway, I could not find that nice pair of blue jeans. I sat down and thought long about that, and I kind of remember now. When I was donating a whole lot of stuff to charities, I pulled those jeans out of the drawer. I do remember thinking to myself that I would never be that skinny again. I'm pretty sure that I donated them to the Brown Elephant resale shop up on Clark Street, in the middle of that very gay neighborhood, Andersonville. Probably some young stud is walking around in my pants right now. Yes.... some young stud in my pants. A man can dream.