Joy To The World

The tree has been taken down. I dragged it out to the street after Mark un-decorated the thing. Now it's just more garbage to be collected by the city, and less clutter for me to knock into as I meander through the house. Sure it was very  pretty, for a while, then the needles started to fall off. I had been very consistent watering it, every day on my belly, reaching in between the presents to give it a drink. But, it isn't Christmas in our house any more, and for that I am happy, however I think it's the opposite for Mark. Right after the last of the crap had been put away, he seemed to turn into a shrew. Yesterday he started out with a bit of a bitchfest, and by the time we stopped for lunch at McDonalds he was going full tilt.

Mark (ordering for the two of us), "I'll have two Big Macs, and two small fries. To go."
Me, "Why not get one large fry, and we could share it."
Mark, "No, I want two small fries."
McDonalds lady, "Okay that'll be two Big Macs, and one large fry."

We weren't even out of the store before Mark lit into me, "I wanted two small fries! You cost me an extra twenty cents ordering that large fry!".
He continued screaming at me as we walked towards the car, "I want what I ordered, not what you want!"
Now I don't think I ordered a large fry. I suggested a large fry. It seems to me that the orderer, Mark, was responsible for correcting the lady behind the counter when she said "one large fry".

Anyway, I don't know how it all got turned around, but by the time we got home I was an asshole for not even thanking Mark for buying lunch. Mind you, I bought him a birthday dinner, I cook him breakfast every day, and whenever a pizza is ordered Mark's wallet is epoxied shut. Well that finally led to neither of us speaking. For three hours the house was quiet except for the blathering television in the bedroom with Judge Judy pontificating. Finally, around five in the evening, Mark came in and apologized, and I mumbled something about being sorry for interfering with his French fry order. My blissful afternoon of quiet was now over, and Mark started talking to me again. Damn it.