McSurgery

Monday was a very nervous day for me. I went in for surgery on my eye. What makes me so nervous is my fear of dying on the operating table, especially after reading stories of horror in the last few weeks. In recent news stories I read that two little girls have died while undergoing simple procedures. One died getting her tonsils out, and the other died at the dentist's office while getting a root canal. 

So on Monday morning Mark drove me up to Boca Raton. I have never had surgery in anything other than a hospital. This was my first time in an 'Outpatient Surgery Center', and it scared the shit out of me. It was little more than a small concrete block structure in the middle of a parking lot. The Seven Eleven on the corner is bigger. Anyway, after sitting in the tiny waiting room for a short time, my name was called. I was ushered into the pre-op area where I was instructed to climb up onto a gurney. This did not gibe with my previous experiences.

"Please sir, get up onto the gurney."

"Um, with my shoes on?"

"Yes, get on up there."

I had carefully picked out my very best pair of underpants for this, and now it turns out that not only will I not be taking off my clothes and switching to one of those nifty ass-less gowns, I don't even have to take off my shoes. I kind of liked it that way. One minute I was telling corny jokes to a very unappreciative anesthesiologist, and the next I was being shown the door. By the way, while prepping me for surgery the nurse remarked about how high my blood pressure was. She seemed very concerned. Like I said, Mark drove me up there.