So the kitchen is pretty much
done. New counter, cabinet, sink, everything cleaned, painted, spackled, and
re-cluttered. So now I can take it easy for a while, right?
"I want you to put new
closet doors up in your office and in the little hallway by the bathroom. Oh,
and don't forget to put that new light fixture up in that hallway too. And
remember, I want the living room painted even though you just painted it a year
ago."
It's not just the work that I
don't want to do, because I don't, it's the expense of doing all these things
that I object to. I would love to put all new stuff into this house. New doors,
new windows, and new, new stuff all around. But I can't. My account is down to just
the scraps at the bottom of the bank's vault. I've tried to sit Mark down and
explain the workings of our household budget, but his eyes just glaze over and
he tells me to raise the tenant's rent. I've tried charts, spread sheets, and
dog toys to illustrate things.
"Now here is what we
have coming in. Ten squeaky toys a month. And here is what we spend, Ten
squeaky toys and this little pile of stuffing that Chandler has ripped out of
squeaky toy eleven. As you can see, if we keep going this way Chandler will
have to tear apart another squeaky toy... which he doesn't have."
Mark just doesn't realize
what it takes to run this place. It's like I am a circus performer, the plate
spinner, and I have ten plates spinning on the end of skinny little poles. If I let one spin down too slowly
everything starts to unravel. I'm sure Mark will understand that analogy,
except he'll swap out plate spinner for a clown.
Oh I love the dog toys analogy!
ReplyDeleteI agree. All math should be able to be explained in dog toys.
ReplyDeletelet me guess...you are the clown
ReplyDelete