Red Meat

 

For the last few months I have had a recurring problem. I keep biting the inside of my mouth while I'm eating. Everybody has done that at one point in their life, but this is different. It's like I'm trying to eat my face from the inside out. Yesterday I bit into my lower lip so hard, I was bleeding. Sure it added some flavor to the Italian sausage sandwich I was eating, but it hurt like hell. I can't quite figure out why this is happening so often. At least once a week, and often twice or three times, I bite the inside of my mouth. I've narrowed part of the problem down to not concentrating on what I'm doing. I noticed that if I look away from my dinner plate, to the side, up, or down, I will bite my cheek. So, if I just keep looking forward, chew slowly, and keep a wad of food in my cheek, I'm fine. I have another theory of what's causing this sudden hunger for human flesh. I lost too much weight. The fat in my face that held up the skin is gone. It now sags tantalizingly close to my teeth. Instead of a nice, plumped up face, I now have old man skin that sags and flutters around like curtains on a breezy day. Eating my way out of this and fattening back up might be the only way to stop it. Or I could drink my meals. Smoothies are good. You don't have to chew them and for my evening dinner smoothie, I could include rum.