Shhh... it's listening

 

I have four Amazon Alexa things placed around the house. As of right now, all I can figure what she's good for is to turn the lights on and off, set a timer, and play music. I'm sure it can do more than that, but things get complicated beyond telling her, "Alexa, light off." Seriously, getting her to sync with the smart plugs I bought for the lights was a challenge. Kind of like the challenge of me not calling her a bitch as I write this. Why would I call an inanimate electronic device foul names? Because I don't think she is completely inanimate. I don't think Alexa is an innocent contraption that is only here for my own good. I think Alexa is always listening to me. I will simply think about something and moments later, on Facebook, ads for what I was thinking will show up. I spoke with Dennis recently about places that old people can move into, where every whim is taken care of for ten thousand dollars a month. Within an hour ads for 'retirement' homes started showing up on my Facebook page. Yes, I know. Amazon and Facebook are not the same company. They have different super rich assholes running them. But I think the super rich assholes all get together and are in cahoots. I think they put Alexa in my house to further their goal of owning a million dollars for every penny I own. Why else would Alexa suddenly stop playing my hillbilly retro music when I quietly tell Scout that she's a good girl? I think it stopped playing music to listen to what I was saying. I don't have any proof, but just an hour later I started getting ads for Farmer's Dog, dog food. I'm telling you, they're in cahoots.... Aw crap, now I'll get ads for bars named Cahoots.