Wii Are Not Amused

I haven't been proficient at a video game since I hung out at a friends bar in Chicago, where I would win at Pac Man on a regular basis. It was 1980 and I was driving a taxi at the time. The only reason I would win at Pac Man is that after I'd drink enough vodka, I could tune out everything else except eating those little yellow balls. When I finally would have too much to drink, and I couldn't even concentrate on Pac Man any more, I'd drive my taxi cab back to the garage and go home.

A few years ago Mark put the Playstation2 at the top of his Christmas wish list. After weeks of whining, pleading, and threatening, I gave in and bought Mark his toy. In the first six months that the Playstation sat on the table next to the television, I think I saw Mark use it three or four times. It continued to sit there for a couple of years, unused and collecting a thick layer of dust, until finally one day it disappeared.

Once again I have been wheedled into buying Mark a toy for Christmas. This time it is the Wii game. One of Mark's arguments for getting this thing, was that you have to actually get up out of the chair and move around to make it work. "It will give your fat ass some exercise!", he cleverly argued. So we now have a Wii attached to our television, and instead of sitting on my ass for hours watching other fat men play football, I am sitting watching Mark and his friends play Wii Bowling. It's all very boring, even when I participate. As for the exercise part of it, I almost immediately proved that idea wrong when I showed Mark that I could get strikes and spares without even getting up out of my recliner chair. At least my wrist will be in good shape.