The thing about growing older is that new surprises await you every day. I get up in the morning and find that a part of my body hurts that I didn't even know had the ability to hurt, like my hair. In old age you suddenly find that those stairs you would bound up a few years ago, are now like climbing a wall to get into your house. One such discovery was about a month ago. I was in the bathroom shaving and a thought came to mind. In a rare moment, I didn't forget that thought. No, this one nagged at me. I kept wondering, what does my back look like? It was the realization that twenty seven years of living in Florida, in a house with a swimming pool, could have had a deleterious effect on my skin. Specifically, the skin on my back because I never used sun screen. So I got out the little hand held mirror, and with my back to the medicine cabinet mirror, held it up so I could see what was going on back there. I was horrified. Giant brown spots spread out across my back along with smaller little pimply things. Cancer! I've got fucking cancer! I called my doctor, who got me an appointment with a dermatologist. I was in a real panic. Would the cancer spread faster than I could get in to see the doctor? So I worried for the last month, waiting for my appointment. Yesterday I saw the doctor. Here is what he told me.
"Hmmm... Are you worried about those two little brown spots? They're nothing to worry about. Just something that happens as you grow older."
"But Doctor, what about those little pimply things?"
"Hmmm... " The doctor held up his magnifying glass close to my shoulders. "Yes, I see those. They're pimples. Nothing to worry about."
Don't judge me too hard. I once thought I had post nasal drip. Turned out I had cancer, non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. So I tend to panic.
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