Orange Juice

 

Yesterday morning, Sunday, I fired up the oven for my two mini-croissants from Trader Joe's. I then fried two eggs, sunny side up, and poured myself a glass of orange juice. I was going to have myself a pleasant Sunday morning breakfast. I used to do this for Mark, fix a fancy ass breakfast on Sundays, so I like to keep up that little bit of my life. The mini-croissants came out perfect. Golden brown and airy, fluffy. I placed my plate of eggs and croissants on the table along with the orange juice. Scout lay next to my chair in anticipation because when I eat, she eats. Scout is a bit plump. Alexa was pumping jazz music throughout the house and all was right with the world... and then I reached for a napkin. Well, goddamnedsonofabitch, I brushed against the glass of orange juice and in slow motion I watched as it spilled across the table drowning everything in its path.

I have this habit when I walk in the house, of dropping whatever I have in my hands on the dining room table. Favorite CDs that I have been listening to in my car, magazines, my wallet, my keys, and the mail. It was all engulfed in orange juice. I also had my new city sticker for the car on the table. That also got orange juice on it. I may have set a new record for the number of times I said the 'F' word repetitively without stopping. Sure, after awhile I punched it up with some other foul curse words, but only saying fuck over and over again helped. I kept repeating it as I ran around with a roll of paper towels trying to sop up the spill. It was a mess.

Mark used to accuse me of purposely spilling glasses and breaking them. I do not do that. I have crappy vision and I don't wear glasses when I eat. I blame the design of beverage glasses for causing me such distress. Wide at the top, and rounded and narrow at the bottom. What the hell, why? It's just an accident waiting to happen. Anyway, I have a new juice glass that I will use from now on. I found it over on the bar next to the whiskey bottle. It's wide and heavy at the bottom, like all glasses should be.

My new juice glass