Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Hippies, Crack Whores, and Drunks, It's a Beautiful Day in The Neighborhood

I have two neighbors who are moving out this month, the family across the street, and the guy in the building next door. Although I live in an upper middle class neighborhood, the actual street I live on is made up of duplexes and triplexes, and whenever you introduce the variable of renters into the mix, things get a little sketchy. The biggest problem is not the folks moving out, they have all been halfway decent renters. The problem is who will the greedy landlords who own the buildings, rent to next. At various times, we have had an old hippie and his dwarf wife living on our block, crack whores, rowdy drunks, bikers, and of course me. Now just the fact that the hippie and dwarf lived across the street wasn't the problem, I have nothing against hippies and dwarfs. It was that they often got drunk and beat the crap out of each other, resulting in cops showing up to break up the loud, profanity laden fight taking place. Besides that bad circus act, just next door to them was a crack whore who used to live next door to me. Every once in a while she would drag her boney ass out into the street to ask passers by for money, mumbling gibberish while standing there with her skinny boobs hanging out. If she happened to spot me walking by, she would come stumbling over, greeting me like some long lost relative. Luckily, I was faster than she was. So I certainly hope I get quiet, clean, neighbors to replace the ones moving out. If they are drinkers, I hope they are happy drunks and don't drag their fights out into the street. I'm tired of seeing the police out there every weekend. I also am crossing my fingers that they don't have too many junk cars that they want to park out front. It only draws attention to the junk cars I have out there.

7 comments:

  1. I understand how you feel Alan. I have lived near many a crack den, many mentally ill [in an extreme way] and many crazy people, this is the joy of renting I guess. It is always a worry of who is gonna move in next.

    Good luck and hope the next batch are entertaining, yet easy to get along with.

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  2. How much are the rents?

    Oh and it's "little people" not "dwarfs."

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  3. I need an apartment in December.

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  4. This doesn't bode well for your trying to sell the place, from a few posts ago?

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  5. Upper middle class neighborhood? Did you move?

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  6. No, you stopped coming around.

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  7. Greedy landlord, I knew I was paying too much rent!

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