How al-Qaeda Terrorists Ruined My Kitchen

I am not happy that I have to replace part of my kitchen that I had just installed thirteen years ago. Even though I know people who redo their kitchens every ten years, for me a kitchen remodel should last half a lifetime. The only drawback is that you have to endure those years when your kitchen looks hopelessly outdated before you enter the 'retro' phase where that mess now is considered hip. The reason I have to replace my kitchen sink, base cabinet, and counter top, is that it is falling apart. Part of the reason it's falling apart is because of a leak in a pipe behind the wall. It literally turned the pressboard cabinets into little more than shredded goo sandwiched between two sheets of vinyl. The other reason my kitchen is falling apart has to do with the date that it was installed by me. On September 8th, 2001 I started to rip out all the old cabinets in my kitchen. I tore up everything right back to the bare walls, and partially to the studs. I finished the demo work on Monday, September 10th. On Tuesday I got up bright and early to walk my dog Molly, with plans to start installing the new cabinets and flooring in the kitchen right after breakfast. I walked the dog, but I did not do anything else that day except watch television. The Today Show was on the TV and Katie Couric and Matt Lauer were telling us that a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center. Three days later I turned off the television and realized I had spent my entire vacation, the vacation where I was going to remodel my kitchen, watching the World Trade Center burn and collapse. I now had only three days to slap that thing together. And that's what I did, I slapped it together. So that's why I now have to repair and replace part of that kitchen job. Because if I do not make it right, then the terrorists have won. Rat bastards.