For sale, lovely Florida triplex, located in the gayest little city in the United States. Lush tropical landscaping, swimming pool, and large deck in the back yard. It would make a
beautiful bed and breakfast for some young couple to operate. Live in one apartment and let the other two (with an optional third) pay your mortgage. First 375K takes it.Why would I want to move out of such a wonderful place? After all, in spite of the pythons, fist sized flying cockroaches, and iguanas that poop in the pool, it is a paradise. My only problem is the months of July, August, September, and October, also known as hurricane season. I'm just getting too old for this crap. As I write this two storms are aimed in our general direction, and the populace is already in a lather, buying up bottled water and canned tuna. (I don't know why, but people who almost never eat tuna, start hoarding the stuff when a hurricane is within three thousand miles of here.) As I close in at the speed of light towards the age of sixty, my knees are starting to give out, and the strength and agility that I used to have are going fast. You need to be hale to own property in a hurricane zone. Besides fighting the hordes trying to fill up their cars with as much gasoline as possible, there is the slapping up of the storm shutters, and clearing the yard of all things that can fly away. Because of Mark's propensity to fill the yard with crap that he 'needs', I now have to find a place to store all of it. Then there is the aftermath if the storm actually hits us. I have blue tarps for the holes in the roof, and a generator for those weeks of being without power, but I
don't have a decent power saw for the fallen trees and crap that inevitably fill the yard. Just the idea of clearing all that debris makes me feel winded.So there it is. If you are young, and adventurous, and enjoy the exhilaration of living through one of natures most impressive displays of power, come on down. In fact, if you bring cash I'll knock 25K off the price.
You sure know how to sell a piece of property
ReplyDeletein a slow market. It almost makes me want to move back to sunny FL.
I thought about you when I heard there was a storm brewing in the Gulf. This shit does get old, and we don't have it nearly as bad as you.
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ReplyDeleteDo the tenents come with it? You mean their rent would pay the mortgage...? hmmmm....
ReplyDeleteWe have a nice lake side lot in beautiful Michigan we could trade, Don says.
Great sales pitch, right up to: "After all, in spite of the pythons...." Anna has disappeared and Bill will turn to the North Atlantic. Relax big guy(and I mean BIG). All areas on this earth have their drawback.
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