I was watching a television show called Genius, by Stephen Hawking the other day. The episode was titled, "Where Are We?" Meaning, where are we in the Universe. It literally made my head hurt and gave me an upset stomach. That's because I just couldn't comprehend how vast the Universe is and how infinitesimal we are.
I've spent a lot of time thinking about life and death this last year. Five months ago I held Mark's hand while I laid in bed with him all night long until he died. It's hard to understand. He was here and then just like that, he was gone. where did he go? What happened to that life that was in his body? I don't believe in religion or a god that is cognizant of our existence, so I don't look for an answer there. Like I said, all this information about the universe and how we fit in simply blows my mind. So I think I'll stop watching big brainy shows about such things. There has to be a middle ground, somewhere between Stephen Hawking and The Real Housewives. Something that won't give me a headache by making me think too much.
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