I'm a Lazy Boy

 

Four of my recent recliner chairs

I'm addicted to recliner chairs. I've gone through about eight of them over the years. Some have lasted four years, some only two years. The one I have now is okay, but I've noticed that the dye in the 'leather' upholstery is coming off. Some of it on the back of my legs when I wear shorts. That's very weird looking, like I have some kind of skin condition. I've found that underneath all the lovely padding and upholstery, all these chairs are pretty much exactly the same. Which is why they seem to break down. My last one, which cost a thousand dollars, simply gave up under the weight of my fat ass and snapped. The metal underpinnings actually snapped in half. So on Saturday I went out to look at buying a new recliner. First stop was a major department store. On their website I saw that they had a sale going on which discounted their already reasonable prices. At the actual store, I couldn't find any of those chairs. Every chair I looked at had a price tag at least twice what I had seen on the website. So I left that place and went to another place, a place you might call a place for room furniture. This room sort of place had the most hideous, ugly furniture I have ever seen. Faux wood carved chairs made out of something that was not wood. Living room furniture with blue LED lights along the lower edge of every piece. There were over exaggerated, imitation Spanish colonial dining room sets. Worst of all were the recliner chairs. Every one  of them, ugly and big enough to seat a four foot wide ass. I'm not perfect, but my ass is nowhere near big enough to fill one of those chairs. My present chair is twenty four inches across and when I sit in it, I still have room for Scout to cuddle up next to me. I gave up on the recliner search and went home. On Tuesday I'm going out to the suburbs to have a medical procedure done. It turns out that less than a mile from where this procedure is being done there is a Lazy Boy store, and they're having a sale. I checked their website just to make sure that they don't cater to only the super fat ass crowd. 

Sized for the American ass.