Wednesday, October 27, 2010

I Can't Believe He Never Gets Punched In The Face

Kind of a busy day yesterday. Mark managed to get me into the PT Cruiser under the pretense that we were getting haircuts. Yes, we got haircuts, but that was just the start of my travels with Mark. I was now his prisoner, and it turned out that he had an agenda. First off, the drug store where I stayed in the car and fiddled with the radio. That wasn't so bad. Next stop, Best Buy where Mark proceeded to argue with an employee about whether or not they should have the camera in stock that was advertised. It was when he asked to see a manager that I informed Mark I'd be over in the music section, where people wouldn't suspect I was with him. Didn't matter. I could still hear him from across the store.
(in a loud high pitched voice), "This is no way to run a store. You advertise a product, don't have it, aren't going to get it in, that is unprofessional."
The only thing is, I couldn't hear the response from the young lady who he was talking to, so it just sounded like a crazy person was somewhere in the store talking to himself. Which was kind of true.

After leaving Best Buy empty handed, we went on to the Home Goods Store. When our shopping safari at Home Goods stretched the limits of my patience, I pointed the cart towards the checkout and told Mark "It's time to leave. We're done." As we waited dutifully for the little electric sign to light up and tell us which register was available, a short, little man, came sidling past everybody in line, and past us as if we didn't exist. He continued on, walked right up to a register, and plopped his stuff in front of the cashier.
"We were next!", Mark shouted. "Are you blind? am I invisible?", he continued. Mark then got right in the guys face, pointed to the line and told him to get back.

At times like this I often just go numb, and pretend I'm in another dimension. All I know is that the guy started yelling back at Mark, Mark continued with his lip flapping, I paid for our purchases, the cashier handed me the receipt, and I headed for the door. There is a fine line between my being embarrassed, and my finding humor in Mark's behavior. At Best Buy, I was embarrassed. At Home Goods, I was initially embarrassed, and then entertained as the little fat man waddled off through the store cursing at Mark. You've got to admit, Mark getting cursed at by a short fat guy is kind of funny.


  1. You two (well at least Mark!) must be so entertaining to the other customers in the store! I know I would stop and watch if I was shopping and heard all that going on.

  2. Let Mark and I go at people that think they rule the world and own the checkout counter--we'd get on TV and spend the night in jail for sure.

    My girlfriend keeps me on a short leash. I don't like crowds much and she has to bribe me with lunch or a movie if she gets me to go out in public. I also spend a great deal of time in the music section.

  3. So didn't anyone else protest that short man cutting in line? or were they all complacent?