Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Robo Call

The caller i.d. said 'Out of Area', as it had for the last ten calls. "Hello!" I screamed into the phone. Once again I could hear the din of a boiler room in the background, and then 'click'. They hung up.......  again.

Welcome to election season.

This is one of the benefits I receive for voting in every election. I get phone calls, constant, irritating phone calls at all hours. This time it was morning, between nine and ten thirty, and it was non-stop. At least a dozen calls before finally somebody announced, "Hello, this is Blah, Blah, from Blah, Blah, we'd just like to ask you .....". I cut her off and started screaming into the phone, "What the hell is wrong with you people!? Why the fuck do you keep calling me!? Are you ........"
'Click'! They hung up again.

The problem is that it's just starting. Before November fourth I will probably get a thousand phone calls, all with mysterious caller i.d.'s from out of state. It's really terribly frustrating. I've been told that I receive so many calls because I'm a reliable voter who votes all the time. I feel so special for that. I can now add that benefit to the rest I receive for voting, like getting called to jury duty every few months, and being governed by greedy little bastards who lie about everything while they suck on the teat of lobbyist's money. Oh, and don't tell me to vote for Tea Party candidates. That's like kicking out a freeloading relative, and inviting a crazy, axe murder to come and sleep on your sofa instead. Well at least it will be over in two weeks, after I go and cast my vote for the least evil of the choices I have. Meanwhile, I can vent some anger and frustration by cursing at all the poor saps manning those phones in the boiler rooms.


  1. I agree with you on this. Because we vote we are subject to these calls at all times of the day and night. It's going to be hard to vote this time since there are so many crappy choices but I will vote because I don't want any of those teabaggers voted in! Now that's scary shit.

  2. Depending on my mood I either ask them to hold on a moment then pour myself a drink and start watching the Phillies. I then time how long they stay on the line--record 6.5 minutes. (Sometimes I go back on and ask if they're still there...)

    Or I see how many profane words I can get in until they hang up--record is 10. Game on, Alan. Try and beat me before you cast your vote.

  3. Oooh, how exciting Hostess. I'm not sure which challenge I should take up first. I'm awfully good at cursing, but putting them on speaker phone and seeing how long they'll hang in there is tempting.

  4. Gone With the Wind-the remake is in the works! It will be a musical starring none other than Adam Lambert and Lucy Lawless. They both look like lesbians to me...

  5. And I thought I was kidding.

    (Copy and paste this url to get where these comments have come from.)


  6. Let's hope to keep those Republinuts at bay.

    They got us into this mess in the first place with eight freaken long years of Bush.