Monday, February 13, 2017

Fingertips Part III



I'm havign a little trougle typing today. My fingers are fycjhed uyp. There are bandafes on sonme ofy thenm, (Okay, I'll start using spell check) both hands are sore, and I might even have some broken bones. I fell again.
I was walking little Scout when she stopped to poop in the middle of somebody's lawn. Like a good citizen I stepped in there and snatched up that turd with one of my doggy poo bags. As I was walking off the lawn, while tying up the end of the poo bag, I stepped on the brick border twisting my ankle. I slammed down on the concrete sidewalk like two hundred pounds of potatoes dropped from the Sears Tower (Yes, I know it's not called that anymore and the Sox don't play in Comisky Park). Pain shot through my body, and I immediately broke out in a chorus of fucks. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck, fuck..... " and on and on for about three minutes. Blood was immediately apparent. I had ripped part of the tip of one finger off, and blood was gushing from a couple of my other fingers. As Scout licked my face and the blood off the sidewalk, people were riding by on bicycles, walking by on the way to work, and driving by. Not one of those assholes stopped to see if I was okay. Oh sure, maybe the madman screaming obscenities caused them to shy away, but there was blood. It should have been obvious that something was wrong. Anyway, after about three or four minutes I was able to roll over and pull myself up. I was a mess. Oh, and that bag of dog shit that I was tying up as I fell? I found it as I rolled over, smashed on the sidewalk under me.

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