It Rhymes With Slut

 (So I don't get sued, I have changed the name of the offending restaurant.)

Chicago is known for pizza. Good pizza, not that slimy stuff you buy on the streets of New York. Just for this post let's not even talk about that thick, deep dish pizza outsiders always talk about. No, Chicago pizza is thin crust with real Italian sausage, mozzarella cheese, and decent sauce. It is cut into squares, not wedges and is crispy at the edge. I worked in a pizza place when I was fifteen years old and I know how it is made. I mixed many hundreds, maybe thousands of pounds of dough back then. I was up to my elbows in flour and yeast, and when I went home my sisters would complain that I smelled like pizza. Those old school Chicago pizza places are disappearing. Up by our house we have the Candlelight, and Calo's. That's about it. Besides those pizza places there are a lot more local pizza parlors that I have not tried. They probably have pretty good pizza because locally sourced ingredients make for good pizza. So why Mark ordered pizza on Saturday from Pizza Slut is a mystery. He must have had a coupon. It was horrible and we threw half of it away in the garbage. It wasn't even drunken breakfast worthy. In fact I couldn't tell where the crust left off and the cardboard carton it came in began. I'm sure there are people who think Pizza Slut is great pizza. Good for you, and good for Pizza Slut. But I'll bet those are the same people who think rice cakes are delicious. They aren't.