Friday, May 30, 2014

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? To Get Out of the Rain.

I awoke early yesterday morning to the jingle jangle of Bette's collar as she trod across my body. I looked over at the clock, it was nearly five in the morning.
            "Do you need to go out?" I asked.
Apparently she did because she leaped off of the bed, then bounded to the back door. She's very good about waking me up and going out to do her peeing now that she's over a year old. It took a lot of patience but it has paid off. Anyway, as I stood outside with her, shining the flashlight while she did her pee dance, I felt the slightest hint of rain. One little drop landed on my arm. I looked up into the sky and another hit me in the face, then another.
            "Hurry up girl, go pee, pee." I commanded.
Bette stopped her circling, looked back at me, and then squatted and peed. Before she could finish and run back to me, a full downpour commenced. That's the way it was all day yesterday from that point on, downpours, lightning, and thunder.
 You would think that our mailman would know how to deal with rain here in rainy Florida. You would think that after delivering mail in every type of rain storm he would understand that he needs to attempt to keep the mail dry. You would be wrong if you thought that. Our mailman believes that all he is required to do is get the mail relatively close to our house, and in one piece. Yesterday, in the height of one of our tropical downpours, I heard the barking and yelping that announce the arrival of the mail. So I put on my shoes and walked out to the front porch. There laying flat on the ground in the mud and rain was a package addressed to Mark. The mailman had simply tossed it over the fence. He could have opened the gate and walked five steps onto the porch where it could have been left high and dry, but he was in a hurry. It was probably time for his afternoon nap in the church parking lot. Inside the package were a number of Broadway posters. That is Mark's latest hobby, spending money on Ebay buying Broadway posters. The contents of the package that the mailman had tossed into the pouring rain were totally ruined. I picked up the package, brought it into the house, and handed it to Mark. Well Mark was madder than a wet hen. So I simply stepped aside as he stormed out of the house. Now I know that I should have gone with him because the scene at the post office was going to be bloody. After all, I knew he was angry, I knew he would scream at the people at the post office, and I knew it would be fun to watch. The only problem was, my video camera wasn't charged up. What would be the point?


  1. Oh I would have loved to see that...
    Hell hath do fury like a Broadway Poster ruined.

  2. use the camera on your cell phone