Thursday, September 8, 2016

Big Bother


Photo taken from the hallway.

Mark watches a lot of reality television. Right this minute I can hear one of his stupid shows on in the living room. I can hear the stilted lines being read by the morons on Big Brother. God I hate that show, maybe even more than I hate the Real Housewives shows. Besides those insipid shows, Mark watches a lot of HGTV. I can't fault him for that, I've watched a bit of it myself. The problem is that Mark thinks all that is real. He believes that the Property Brothers really can whip up a fantastic kitchen in one week. For the last year and a half, before we sold our house and moved, he studied House Hunters for tips. The one thing that all the shows on HGTV have in common is that they do remodeling cheaply and quickly. Mark thinks that it is all authentic, that none of it is edited. He sees just how easy it is and commits to a home improvement idea whether I like it or not. Like painting our bedroom. Our bedroom was just painted by the previous owner a few months before we moved in. No need to paint it. Okay, so it was kind of a pustule color of yellow. I was fine with that. All I do in there is sleep, and it's dark, and I didn't want to paint the damn bedroom. You have to understand that our bedroom is just that. A bedroom. It's not at all like our spacious master bedroom back in Florida. No, we squeezed a gigantic king sized bed into a 1922 sized bedroom. There is just enough room for me to sidle around the bed, over to my side at night. So of course I painted it. I am now sore, and achy from twisting, squatting, crawling, and bending. I gave in and painted "Mark's" bedroom. Oh, and speaking of bedrooms, Scout's bedroom (AKA the kitchen) should be done by next week. Mark originally thought that I could do the kitchen remodel myself since I remodeled our kitchen in Florida... fifteen years ago. When I was still young.

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