Giving My Neighbors a Blow Job

Now that winter is officially here, Chicagoans have entered the whining about the weather phase of the season. It's tradition. You are expected to complain for the next three months and pine for summer. Honestly, it isn't so bad. Just as long as you don't have to go to work, as long as you have a fenced in yard to let the dogs out into, it isn't that rough. Of course we haven't had one of those four foot snowfalls yet. I'm not sure how my little snow blower would handle that since it kind of choked when I hit a six inch drift last week. But what the hell. It's winter, and instead of going outside I can catch up on all the half read books I have sitting on my kindle.

One little note about this past summer. All summer long I kept my yard neatly mowed and I also kept my next door neighbor's yard mowed. I had to, otherwise the dogs would have got lost when they wandered over there. My neighbor is a nice guy, but he isn't much for yard work. Now that it is winter my attention has turned from mowing the lawn to clearing the snow off of the sidewalks. Don't want some asshole slipping and suing me. So far most of the snow that has fallen, has fallen overnight. So when I get up in the morning I would really like to go out there and plow through it with the snow blower. Problem is I wake up around six in the morning. For the first two snows of the season, I was reluctant to start the snow blower at that hour. So when I finally cleared the sidewalks around nine in the morning, the snow was already tramped down and hard to clear. Then it hit me. I knew how to take care of the 'snow blowing at six o'clock in the morning' problem. Clear your neighbor's sidewalks too. Start the engine, let it make as much noise as it can, and then go to town on that snow. So that's what I did. From the alley on down to the third house I cleared the snow. Neither one of those neighbors on either side of my house complained as I passed in front of their homes, spewing white fluff into the air. In fact they both came out, smiled, and one of them even brought out a broom and swept the snow off of my porch.