Self Loathing

I'm feeling fat. I weighed myself and I am at my upper limit, the most I ever weighed. I blame this self isolating crap for this. Sitting around all day long with not much to do, eating crap food, and taking too many naps. You would think that I would be ready for this, after all I have been basically doing the same thing for the last two years. Every since Mark got too sick to go out or travel much, I have been self isolated. Other than my four hours of bowling on Tuesday nights, and my four hours driving out to see Mom, I was doing nothing. Now those two outlets have been taken away from me. Add to that Mark's recent craving for baked goods. Lately he's had me baking brownies, lemon squares, and whatever the hell else comes in an easy to bake, box mix. Yes, I know. I can spend time cleaning the house, gardening, fixing shit around here. But those naps, they just happen at the oddest times.