Scariest Halloween Ever

 

Joe the Plumber and Barack (Mark) Obama. Halloween, 2008

I don't know what to do about Halloween. Do I buy candy to give to the kids, or won't they be coming by? Last thing I need is a bag of candy in the house and no kids to hand it out to. Last year not one kid, nobody, came to our house trick or treating. Probably because we had experienced a Chicago phenomenon. Snow, ice, and temperatures in the low twenties. Rare for October, but it is Chicago where weather rules don't apply. This year, we have a virus that kids could be leaving on the doorstep of every house on our block. Kind of a reverse trick or treat. 

"Here grandpa, have some corona and thanks for the contaminated Snickers." 

Halloween was always Mark's thing. He would buy bags and bags of candy for the kids. He would dress up in costume to go out to party in the bars. I would do nothing. However, this year I am on my own. So today I will go to the Jewel and buy one small bag of candy, just in case. I'll make sure it's one that my friend Dennis likes so it won't go to waste. In fact, maybe I won't buy any candy at all. No need to give Dennis diabetes. Instead, I'll turn off all the lights, pull the shades, and hope nobody comes around. Damn this covid19 shit is scary.