Wednesday, April 29, 2009


When I first moved to Florida, I noticed a bumper sticker on quite a few pickup trucks. It read, "I Don't Care How You Did It Up North!", with the "screw you, you idiot" implied. I guess you can't argue with logic like that.

When I lived up north, I had relatively consistent electrical service. Yes, when a huge thunderstorm with high winds and lightning would roll through, there was always a chance of losing your electricity, but for the most part I could count on getting juice when I plugged something in. Not now, and not for the last twenty years of living in Florida, have I had reliable electric service. At least when I lived up north, I didn't have to keep flashlights in every room. Here I can be typing away on my stupid little stories, and in the blink of an eye the house has gone silent, and dark. It's no wonder there are so many house fires that are started by candles, not to mention the carbon monoxide deaths caused by numbskulls who put generators in their attached garage.

Once again, this morning we lost power. It wasn't the little pop off and pop on type that happens about once a week scrambling the data on my computer. This was the kind that lasts for hours, and requires me to get on the phone and speak to a condescending boob who is in an air-conditioned office that never loses power, because it's owned by the power company. What really pissed me off is that it was a beautiful, sunny day, there was no reason for the electric to go out. Anyway, Mark and I went off to have an early breakfast, and when we returned, the power company was just arriving. What was really sad, is that I knew more about their utility pole in the back yard than they did. At least I was able to point out the problem and they quickly got our power back on. Kind of like how they do it up north.


  1. we've got electricity but no alligators...sigh...

  2. The Xindi People of the Alpha Centauri SystemApril 29, 2009 at 9:49 PM

    You earthlings are still using wires to conduct electricity?

    We will have to send you some of our technitians to teach your power companies Tachyon particle accelerators and neutrino ion generator technology.

  3. We will accept your technicians and we will send you teachers who will help you learn how to spell American English.

  4. You can buy a whole house generator which kicks on whenever your electricity is interrupted. You then would not have to rely on the electric monopoly regulated by the government.

  5. Xindi Cultural Affairs DivisionMay 4, 2009 at 8:48 AM

    It is not that we Xindi people cannot spell your language, rather there was a "glitch" in our universal translator device. We sincerely apologize the the pig lips.

  6. Update on the power failure.

    It was an iguana that shorted out the transformer. Fried iguana.

  7. Xindi Technical Systems AnalysisMay 4, 2009 at 9:17 PM

    Yum, Xindi favorite food. We apologize for our translator miscommunications.