( * )
The world seems to be divided up between the assholes, and non-assholes. We have assholes driving cars, assholes in our government, and assholes who get drunk in bars and cause trouble. Assholes are everywhere. Then there are the non-assholes of our world. People who let you in when traffic is heavy, politicians who aren't assholes and actually are looking out for the little guy, and of course the non-asshole drunk in the bar. That would be me. I'm a happy drunk who doesn't bother other people.( * )
We have greedy assholes, celebrity assholes, religious assholes, law enforcement assholes, criminal assholes. It's the many flavors of ass-holiness, and it tastes like ass. Sometimes non-assholes will drift over into ass-holiness, and do something stupid. Then again assholes will suddenly do the unexpected, and act decent. I know, I've been there. In fact we probably all have been there at one time or another, switching back and forth. ( * )
On bowling night I have to walk my dogs much later than usual, and I carry a small flashlight to warn the rare driver that I am in the street. Last week a car came speeding down the street, so I gave it a wiggle with my flashlight. To my horror, the car started aiming towards me, and actually drove up onto the grass where Chandler and I had taken refuge. It sped on so fast that I couldn't get a good identification. Again this week after bowling, I was walking Chandler and here comes the speeder again. This time I just moved well out of the street, but tried to identify the asshole. It seems that this particular asshole speeds down the street at the same time every week, and I will eventually figure out who this asshole is. When I do figure that out, I will then cross over into ass-holiness myself. I will get even, and then return to my non-asshole status. At least for the time being, until I have to call upon my inner asshole again.
Notify the cops and have them waiting for him.
ReplyDeleteExactly what I was going to suggest, Garrett. At the very least the officer will be able to "up" his ticket numbers!
ReplyDeleteAh,ha,ha,ha... the police will be waiting for him. Cops are busy at that hour. That's when Krispy Kreme donuts are hot out of the fryer.
ReplyDeleteYears ago I came to the conclusion that the police are of very marginal value. They only worry the law abiding people. Assholes don't care, and many cops are the assholes.
Box-o-nails, roll-o-pennies. It's not what Batman might use but it will make the point nicely.
ReplyDeleteI remember a story in which Garrett was the star.Someone in a Jeep tossed a heavy drink mug at Garrett for some unexplained reason. Now the way I remember it, Garrett didn't notify a cop, but got even. I wonder if Garrett can finish the story.
ReplyDeleteI know I wrote about that one somewhere on this blog, but I've searched and I cannot find it. Maybe I was just thinking about that when I was writing about assholes.
ReplyDelete