Monday, April 28, 2008

NOT Another Cat Story

It's been a few weeks since we let Fat Kitty into the house, and she has adapted quite nicely. She and Molly are tolerating each other quite well, maybe because Molly looks at her as another purveyor of that delicacy, 'cat poop rolled in kitty litter'. Unfortunately Fat Kitty and Carlotta are not getting along all that well. Almost everyday there is a vicious cat fight. The last one was yesterday at five thirty in the morning. The sound of screeching cats pulled me out of a deep sleep, and when I found them, Fat Kitty was cowering in a corner. I can't believe skinny little Carlotta can cause such fear in Fat Kitty, who weighs twice as much as her. I have noticed that Fat Kitty has been using Molly as a buffer. She likes to sleep on the back of the sofa with Molly in front of her. Smart kitty, she has already figured out that Carlotta won't fuck with Molly.

It only took Fat Kitty one day to associate the sound of the tin of cat food being opened, and dinner. When she hears that sound she puts aside all fear of Carlotta and slowly slides into the kitchen. It is the Pavlovian thing, no matter the fear, she cannot resist the sound of the can opening. I guess it is the same for Molly, because as soon as she hears Mark in the kitchen, she is there. To Molly, Mark is the source of beef, and you can follow her saliva trail from the living room into the kitchen. It’s usually right next to my saliva trail.

I'm pretty sure humans are just as susceptible to Pavlovian responses. When we were kids on Ravinia Drive, no matter how loud things were or what we where doing, we could hear the faint ding, ding of the Good Humor ice cream man an hour before he even got to our street. We would then run to our mother and pester her for a few cents. If she gave us a nickel, or more, we would run out and sit there on the curb in anticipation, all the while clenching that cash in our sweaty little hands.

Most of the time the Good Humor truck was driven by a good looking college boy, as a summer job. This of course caused all the girls in the neighborhood to flock to the ice cream truck like pigeons being fed by an old lady, and made it difficult for the rest of us to even get close enough to put in our order.

It would be neat if the Good Humor Man still came around, especially if the truck were driven by a good looking college boy. I would be out there every afternoon waiting for him. The only problem is that I'd totally be off of my diet, and have to explain to Mark why I was eating so much ice cream.
He's been in college a long time.


  1. Thanks for the inspiration 'Nothing to See Here'.

  2. :O me?? :O

    I really love this picture here with the Cat and dog sleeping, it such a good defense mechanism too !!

  3. Get a squirt gun and every time Carlota goes near Fat Kitty, give her a little spritz, that should stop her from tormenting the new guy.
    I loved the Good Humor truck, however I never remember young college boys driving them. We had the same old guy every year. His ice cream was still very good.

  4. You should separate your cats into different rooms with the door closed between them before you go to bed and each time you and Mark are out of the house. You could also put a bell on Carlotta so Fat Kitty know she is coming.

    Apparently Carlotta still sees Fat Kitty as a threat. You might want to get some Feliway Spray ( to calm her down or when they are together give them some good quality catnip. (Cosmic Organic Catnip)

    Make their time together enjoyable.

    You might want to have their claws trimmed to avoid and serious scratches. Whatever you do don't declaw them. It is cruel and painful. (


  6. We never had the good humor man here :( just these scary pink things flying around the roads!

    Reasons to be pissed off about the UK no.10000000000062 :D

  7. To Anonymous: It's called amputation and it is similar to having your fingers cut off at the first knuckle. It is just now beginning to be banned in the U.S. (West Hollywood, CA) I believe declawing is banned in the U.K. or some other euopean countries. Right, "nothing to see :O"?

    Getting back to the Good Humor this blog in someway related to Alan's alter ego? There is a job for you Alan, get one of those riding bicycle ice cream carts and ride up and down the "drive" during and after happy hour. You'll make tons of $$ and meet lots of hotties. hehe

  8. Garet, You would have an almost blind man peddling down one of the most dangerous streets in town? Yes hotties, everyone is a hottie here in August. Hot and humid.

  9. I knew I would get a response from Garet.
    It works every time.

  10. Kitties and Good Humor man, hmmm? I don't know how you do it Alan. The way you transition from one topic to another is an art.

    No to de-clawing. Yes to neutering or spading. Yes to spray bottle. Yes to clipping nails. No to seperating the cats every night and while you're away. Yes to a bell on Carlotta. Yes to a place for Garet in the graveyard!!! hehehe

  11. Yes Alan has a way of creating a blog about one thing and ending it with a totally different topic.