Thursday, August 1, 2013

I Find a Lump

If it wasn't for the fact that I had Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma, a.k.a. cancer of the lymph nodes twenty five years ago, finding a lump wouldn't have caused as much consternation as it did.

This past Monday morning I felt a slight twinge on the left side of my rib cage. I reached around and gave myself a little massage where I had felt the pain. As I worked the flesh around I noticed a lump about the size of my fist. I checked the other side of my body, and there was no such lump there. Like I said, having had cancer I tend to panic over things like this. So I called my doctor and made an appointment.

Yesterday I went to see the doctor. Sitting there on the end of that examining table brought it all to a head, I was nervous. As I was waiting for the doctor to come in I steeled myself for the upcoming diagnosis. I was ready for the worst, twelve weeks of chemo, radiation, death. I was ready. Finally the doctor came in, asked a few questions, and then took a close look at my lump.
"Hmmmm..." Was all he said while poking and prodding the offending piece. Then he checked the other side of my body, and after a quick feel he gave his opinion.
"You're fat."
"Huh, what?"
"It's nothing to worry about. You have a typical fatty deposit for overweight people. It is a benign pocket of fat. No cancer, nothing to worry about. Unless being fat worries you."
So now I had the heavy weight of cancer lifted off my mind, only to realize that my doctor had called me fat. I call myself fat and that's okay because I think that it's only a temporary condition. This though, was stunning news. After all, for my doctor to call me fat... well that's like being officially fat.


  1. Nothing scarier than finding a lump. I'm so glad to hear that the doctor called you "fat" instead of saying you have cancer. At least "fat" is something you can kind of control!!

  2. I'm so very glad you don't have a recurrence of cancer.

    You are like my Labrador. I took her to the vet about a lump and she also identified it as a "fatty deposit". She also got out the weight chart for my cat and we both agreed she was "husky".

    I sneak up on my bathroom scale every morning but it doesn't seem to work...

  3. I'll take FAT over cancer anyday! You scared the crap out of me when I saw the title of your post. Going in for Knee surgery, diagnosis - Obese! Oh well, fat is fat!

  4. Sue, how does fat turn into knee surgery? Fat on the knee?

    Hostess, my doctor is cheaper than the vet otherwise I'd have had her take a look at it.

  5. Recently we had a patient who raised holy hell and wanted her chart revised because she was noted as being "obese". She is 5ft. tall and 240#....I believe it qualifies as obese in anybody's book!! I guess if you look in the mirror and choose not to see it you want everyone else to join your fantasy!

  6. Glad you don't have cancer, that was alarming. Where did you find that gross photo??

  7. just part of the plan to fatten you up before the...

  8. at least its not flying roaches