If it wasn't for the fact that I had Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma, a.k.a. cancer of the lymph nodes twenty five years ago, finding a lump wouldn't have caused as much consternation as it did.
This past Monday morning I felt a slight twinge on the left side of my rib cage. I reached around and gave myself a little massage where I had felt the pain. As I worked the flesh around I noticed a lump about the size of my fist. I checked the other side of my body, and there was no such lump there. Like I said, having had cancer I tend to panic over things like this. So I called my doctor and made an appointment.
Yesterday I went to see the doctor. Sitting there on the end of that examining table brought it all to a head, I was nervous. As I was waiting for the doctor to come in I steeled myself for the upcoming diagnosis. I was ready for the worst, twelve weeks of chemo, radiation, death. I was ready. Finally the doctor came in, asked a few questions, and then took a close look at my lump.
"Hmmmm..." Was all he said while poking and prodding the offending piece. Then he checked the other side of my body, and after a quick feel he gave his opinion.
"It's nothing to worry about. You have a typical fatty deposit for overweight people. It is a benign pocket of fat. No cancer, nothing to worry about. Unless being fat worries you."
So now I had the heavy weight of cancer lifted off my mind, only to realize that my doctor had called me fat. I call myself fat and that's okay because I think that it's only a temporary condition. This though, was stunning news. After all, for my doctor to call me fat... well that's like being officially fat.