Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Doc Day Afternoon

This seems promising. I've arrived at my eye doctor's office ten minutes before my appointment, and there is only one other person in the waiting room. I should be in and out of here quickly. I sign in, and take a seat. About five minutes later a lady and her husband get off the elevator, and walk over to the optometrist's desk. She has broken her glasses, and needs them to be repaired. It went like this.

"I was going outside with my dog when I walked into the glass sliding door, now my glasses need a big adjustment, ha, ha, my dog must have thought I was an idiot because I was in such a hurry, did you know that we are grandparents now he is such a cute little baby I think I like my pair of glasses that I got in nineteen eighty two better than the ones I just broke I should get a pair just like them, unless they don't make them anymore, this is our first grandchild our daughter is a great mother and breast feeds I think sometimes in public but that's alright because I can't see it very well now anyway because I walked into that glass door......   "

It was as if somebody had flipped a switch and she was off and running. I know I put some commas in there, but only because the possibility of her going that long without a breath isn't very likely. She went on, and on, with her husband only getting in a few grunts now and then. The optometrist simply talked over her. When she finally left with her repaired glasses, I looked at the time. I'd been waiting an hour. It was two thirty, and my appointment was for one thirty. Just as I was about to start bitching to the receptionist about that, the lady who does the eye tests called my name. The eye test is called the 'Field of Vision' test. Basically you put your head in a box with little flashing pin-point lights, and you press a button every time you see a light. I hate it. It's like torture for me. It's hot, the examination room is tiny, and just for a little bit of added atmosphere the technician let out a silent stinker.


  1. Impatient does not mean
    "I (a)m Patient"

    Sounds like you had a tortuous experience being subjected to a rambling voice, head locked in a contraption, bright lights forced in your eyes, and aromatherapy.

  2. I always feel like I failed the eye test and reading glasses are the bad grade.

  3. My dreaded field test is next week.

  4. The lady testing me says I fell asleep at one point during the test. I cannot stare at that orange dot for more than a minute without zoning out.

  5. Fell asleep??! Nah, you "passed out" as Pearl says!! She is constantly telling any doctor we take her to that she blacks out many times during the day. Even had to have a cardiac work-up when that doc didn't believe me that she was napping! Well, 92 yrs old, home is at 95 degrees, and she watches cooking shows all day-who wouldn't doze off!