Friday, June 28, 2013

I Do... Not

Woo hoo! It's a great and momentous time in the history of the United States. The Supreme Court has said that you cannot legislate a group of people into a lower class than everybody else. You cannot pass a law that says two people have the right to marry and another couple do not. They also made a point that the marriage of two people of the same sex does not in any way harm the marriage of two Southern Baptists, a Kardashian, or twenty Mormons.
Hoo.. fuckin... ray!!!
Now my friends who got married three years ago in Boston, if they move back to Boston, are legally married. And then there are my friends from California who got gay married five years ago during that short one month window of legality out there. Unfortunately for me, I do not want to get married. Seriously, I do not want to do that. I have lived for sixty three years as a single person and I don't see any reason to change that now.

As soon as MSNBC announced the SCOTUS decision, Mark started planning our wedding.
"We can get married in Chicago at the Drake Hotel, overlooking the Oak Street Beach. Oh, or at that Peninsula Hotel." He gushed.
"But I don't wanna get married...  " I whimpered, as tears filled my eyes.
Geez, the look I got from Mark. Like I had just punched him in the gut. Here's the thing. I hate weddings (all you nephews and nieces had still better invite me). They are just another version of a party, and I really hate parties. So anyway, I finally told Mark that on my death bed I might re-visit this marriage thing. In fact I might re-visit it sooner than that. I'll have to check, but if I can get survivor benefits from Social Security I just might do the dirty deed when Mark turns retirement age.


  1. I am +1 and we would both like the salmon.

  2. So the plan is coming together.

  3. Anonymous, We are planning our honeymoon at the Greenview/Sunnyside hotel.

  4. Alan, You should also remind Mark that the Illinois House of Representatives failed to pass marriage equality a month ago for the second time this year, and it ain't legal for two men to be married at the Drake Hotel in Chicago. (yet?)

    It really is getting late for those of us in our sixties to bother, after living in "sin" for so many years.

    But then getting married may be an excuse for a big partee?

  5. The G/S Hotel went out of business. It's now Starbucks.

  6. The nieces like inviting you to weddings even if you do party-poop out at 10pm! However, we leave it to the party-sisters to drag you out of your cozy sleep to party-on into the night at the hotel bars!!
    P.S. if you do get married in Florida, I won't come in June, July, August.....