My Grandfather was born in January, 1886 and died in January 1988. My youngest nieces and nephews may live until 2086 and beyond. That means I have known people, and do know people, from a span of two hundred years. If I live as long as my grandfather, I’ll see the year 2051. I know I’m a nerd for finding things like that fascinating, I just always have.
The world my grandfather was born into was nothing like the world today. There were no automobiles, no phones, no electric lights, and the streets smelled of horse poop. The world population was about one and a half billion people in 1886. Today the world population is six and a half billion people, which explains why you’re sitting in traffic jams every day.
Grandparents are such a great thing to have when you’re growing up. They give you a respite from your parents for awhile, and treat you better than they ever treated your mom or dad.
I would hang out at my grandma and grandpa’s house quite a bit when I was young and some of the stories I heard from my grandfather were quite interesting to me. I think the most fascinating object that I inherited from him is a set of brass knuckles, which I think might be illegal now. We can only imagine the stories connected to that object, because he never did explain what he used them for. I wish I had written down some of his stories, because now they are a little fuzzy, like the time he fell either a hundred feet or maybe twenty feet, off a ladder. This was while he was on a construction crew, building Chicago’s city hall. All I can remember is that he climbed back up and continued working, refusing to go to the doctor. The next day he couldn’t get out of bed and was out of work for weeks. 
Another favorite story of his that he told, was the time he bought a car, or as he referred to it, a ‘machine’. One of those old ones that sat up high, with the skinny tires. The way I remember him telling it, he took the ‘machine’ out onto a street with streetcars and promptly got the skinny tires stuck in the streetcar tracks. He got out of the ‘machine’ and left it there in the middle of the street, never to drive a car again in his life.
I don’t know what kind of a world my nephews, nieces, and their children are going to inherit from us. I hope in the year 2086, one of them is telling a great grandchild about their great, great, great, grandpa and how he played Santa for them, and maybe telling them about their eccentric ‘Uncle Alan’ who drowned in a nursing home, in Florida, during the hurricane of 2051.
Another favorite story of his that he told, was the time he bought a car, or as he referred to it, a ‘machine’. One of those old ones that sat up high, with the skinny tires. The way I remember him telling it, he took the ‘machine’ out onto a street with streetcars and promptly got the skinny tires stuck in the streetcar tracks. He got out of the ‘machine’ and left it there in the middle of the street, never to drive a car again in his life.
I don’t know what kind of a world my nephews, nieces, and their children are going to inherit from us. I hope in the year 2086, one of them is telling a great grandchild about their great, great, great, grandpa and how he played Santa for them, and maybe telling them about their eccentric ‘Uncle Alan’ who drowned in a nursing home, in Florida, during the hurricane of 2051.
I remember one time going to visit your grandpa. He was 99 at the time. We sat and watched sports on TV. He asks us if we wanted a beer. I think he dug out a couple cans that may have been in his fridge for sometime. I believe we asked him how long they have been in there and he didn't know. So after own beverages somehow I got into an arm wrestling match with Grandpa Webb. I thought to myself, "this is ridiculous, I'm young and strong. There's no way he's gonna win." Well, at first I was winning and I thought, "this is gonna be way too easy." Then outta nowhere came this burst of strength and I was put on the defensive! What the?... and as hard as it is to always admit it, Grandpa Webb still had the strength of a 20 years old and floored me. So a 99 year old man beat a 29 year old. I would have never believed it had I not been on the losing end.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure if grandpa was strong or you had a noodle arm.
ReplyDeleteGreat story Alan. At least until the last sentence. You have a twisted sense of humor that never ceases to amaze me. Keep it up.
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