When we were kids my dad was the master of recycling, usually damaged goods off the trucks at ‘Associated Truck Lines’, where he worked. One time he brought home a really nice easy chair for the living room. It quickly became my favorite chair to watch TV from and it looked great. The only problem was, that it had survived a fire in the back of one of the semi-trucks, and every time you sat in it, you carried the scent of burnt truck with you for the rest of the day. That actually worked out well for me, I could hide my pre-pubescent cigarette smoking by telling my mom, "I was sitting in the chair". 
One Christmas my dad recycled a ‘damaged’ Christmas tree off one of the trucks. It was one of those aluminum trees with the spotlight color wheel. While my dad had figured he’d scored a good one, we kids hated it. We knew that it just wasn’t Christmas without a real tree, with the real tree smell and real tree mess. We whined loud and long, until dad relented and bought a real tree, which was put up and decorated in the dining room. Every year after that, we would put the flashy, garish, aluminum tree in the front window and still get the ‘real Christmas’ smell from the tree in the dining room.
Mark’s Christmas tree, though artificial, looks great and I can’t complain because I didn’t have to help put it up. However, it doesn’t have the ‘real Christmas’ smell that brings back all the memories of childhood. In an attempt to bring that aroma into the house, I thought it would be great to buy one of those pine scented car deodorants that you hang from the rear view mirror, and hang it on the tree. That was a stupid idea, I am still gagging from the cloying smell. It was like I was trapped in a French whore house set in a pine forest. I threw the damn thing out hours ago and the odor is still as strong as when I first hung it on the tree.
There is no substitute for the smell of a real pine Christmas tree, so I think the answer is to buy a second small real tree and put it in the sun room. Now if I can get the smell of French whores and lumberjacks off me I’ll be happy.
It's nice to have more than one tree. I have never done that, but I know lots of people who have multiple trees. The small real one sounds like a good idea.
ReplyDeleteThat's so you, Alan. I guess we really do turn into our parents. I had to laugh. I hope the smell is gone by Christmas. hehe
ReplyDeleteI actually do have a silver tree up right now, complete with the spinning color wheel. But it's really because the entire downstairs of the house is gutted and I didn't feel like putting up the tree in the middle of debris and drywall dust, nevermind asking the contractors to gently step around it and not break my ornaments. So the silver tree is up in our bedroom.
ReplyDeleteplus, I like the damn silver tree. I just burn a pine scented candle. If you buy a good quality one it's actually pretty nice. however, I've never really had a real tree except for once as a kid and one year in college. I couldn't touch it either time though, wilderness gives me hives.
Your mother must be really evil to have never given you the joy of real pine sap stuck to your hands.
ReplyDeleteOn the contrary, Alan. We had real trees when the kids were little... even had a "living" tree one year that is growing nicely in the backyard now! Between the allergic reactions and mess of pine needles I went the fake route finally and never looked back.
ReplyDeletePS: I found that silver tree that Laura has at a garage sale for $20! That's before they became popular again!