Here in Florida, there are a group of people who feel extremely threatened by the thought of a man marrying a man, or a woman marrying a woman. So threatened, that they have gathered enough signatures to have it put on the November ballot, to ban such an outrageous idea.
Paul and Me
Even though I have had the most fun in my life when I was single, for some reason I've always felt compelled to form a more permanent relationship with another man. Back in the 1970's we called each other 'lovers' when we set up house together. Then sometime in the last ten or twenty years, that became passé, and I started hearing people referring to their lovers as 'partners'. That's fine with me, because I don't know what the alternative would be. Husband or wife, or maybe wusband or hife? My dad used to refer to them as “Alan’s special friend”.
Me and Chuck
Because I am a reasonable man, the times I have broken up with my wusbands went pretty smoothly. We simply divided our property and went our ways without hysterics or court intervention. I'm sure some of my heterosexual friends wish it was that simple for them. I often wonder what would have happened if I was legally married? I think the outcome would have been exactly the same, the mutual property would have been divided equally but the lawyers would have taken my money.
Me and Garet
I often hear the anti-gay-marriage people, or AGM's saying marriage is for procreation. If this is true, then it should also be banned for any man and woman who are not capable of having a baby, including any couple past child bearing years. The truth is that marriage goes back thousands of years to a time when man was tribal and women were considered property. Marriage was a way of securing that property from the other men in your tribe who were out on the prowl, kind of like men in a singles bar nowadays. What the AGM's don't understand is that nobody is saying that they want churches to be forced to perform 'gay marriages'. We only want the same benefits that the government sanctions for heterosexual marriage .
Me and Mark
My wusband Mark and I have been together eleven years this coming April, longer than any other relationship I've had before. I don't know that it is more successful than my time with Garet, Chuck, or, Paul, I think maybe I am just a bit more patient. If I was able to marry Mark, I don't know that I would. After all, why fix what isn’t broken. But then again, there are the wedding presents.
Well Liz Taylor, you certainly would have had a lot of lawyer bills with all those divorces. Hearing you through the walls for years, I'm not sure patients is what you have developed. Maybe it's devouring the delicious meals you've been eating for the last 11 years. That and two TV's.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what I think about gay marriage. On one hand I feel that we should have the right, on the other I don't know why we would want to do the same thing that straights do just to prove a point.
ReplyDeleteI guess it's a personal preference and we should at least be afforded the right to take advantage of the same tax and legal advantages as straight people.
I agree with your outlook. Why try to fix what isn't broken.
I first met Alan at Dennis's house in Chicago back in 1982. A year later I was on beach with a friend when someone hit me upside the head with a wad of Seaweed.
ReplyDeleteThat person was Alan.
For the next approximately 12 years we lived together until 1995 when I decide to invest in real estate.
In hetro years that is like being together for 25-35 years. I believe k d lang said something like that about her relationship.
We had many fun times and experiences and travels and Alan remains a good friend. Like a brother. As does Dennis.
Alan and Dennis were the "winds beneath my wings" and who helped me become a successful person. Thanks guys. I'm grateful.
I went on to meet Bill who I lived with for 8 years before he died of cancer 5 years ago.
My how time does fly.
I now spend my time taking care of a heard of animals from 2 wild rabbits, to 20 deer, to 1 possum, to flocks of birds and wild turkeys, to 12 cats on the family farm in Michigan. I also care for 6mentally challenged foster care adults in a group home.
So someday I would either like to raise crops like my grandad did 60 years ago or become a Hindu Buddist monk in Tibet.
Go figure.
is it because someone says you shouldn't? is it to prove a point? is it for legal advantages or rights? is it because of love? i don't know why so many people feel it's their business to control or regulate something that has nothing to do with them. really, it drives me nuts.
ReplyDeleteit's hard enough to know what you want in life.
the marriage just documents it, a sealed deal in all honesty. a marriage means whatever it needs to mean between two people. it is a declairation of love and commitment to everyone around you. i think whatever two people mean to eachother is what really matters.
i almost feel like i don't even have the right to comment on such a strong issue because really...a gay persons happiness in marriage has nothing to do with me. or at least it shouldn't.
I missed this blog earlier...good thing I'm going through your archives rather than working.
ReplyDeleteYou pretty much summed up my feelings on marriage - gay or straight. I've been with Dustin for...I have no idea how long...but it's somewhere near 6 years. We're lived together for 2 1/2 years and we bought a house together 1 1/2 years ago.
Until a few weeks ago, I was perfectly content to never get married. I have no doubts about our relationship - we are really happy and I don't feel like I need a piece of paper to stick around. However, a few weeks ago Dustin was rushed to the hospital. He's fine, but on the way there all I could think was "what if they won't let me into the hospital room? what if they won't tell me about what's going on because I'm his girlfriend and not his wife?" and then I really got it. I have always felt badly that gay marriage is not legal.
AGM people talk about gay marriage "defiling" straight marriage. Really? Straight people taint the "sanctity" of marriage plenty on their own.
I have always thought gm should be legal. Why should I care if other people are happy and in love? It doesn't hurt anyone.
Anyway, the hospital ended up being really cool by letting me in the room right away but I couldn't help but feel bad. I have the legal ability (even the religious ability) to get married and obtain access to the benefits and rights of marriage.
So many straight people take that for granted. Don't get me wrong, I'm not about to race down the aisle. I just feel really guilty for not taking advantage of something that so many people are fighting so hard to obtain. Something so simple and that seems so obvious to me. How can it not be legal to vow to love someone for the rest of your life?
Plus, you know, I really want the gifts. And the big party.